A Christian
A Christian: Mervi Kalmus
Hello Mervi
Hello
It's nice that we can get to know you a bit better during this program
And that we can talk about different things that fill your life
But first of all I want to ask
Do you remember, what's your first memory from childhood?
Or what's the first thing that comes to your mind when thinking of childhood?
I can't remember
I can't remember anything
Well, first 7 years of my life I lived in Tallinn
And I remember Tallinn's church quite well
I remember Pääsküla where we lived
This house, this garden, these games, boys next door
Going to church, walks, but
From very early age I don't have any specific memories
Maybe these things you need to ask
Not that my parents could remember my memories but
But if you want to know something about me as a small kid
Then I guess my parents know the best
You belong to this specific group of people who are called pastor's kids, right
What do you think and how do you feel
How much has it influenced your life that you have grown up in a pastor's family?
I think it influences a lot even when
Some would like to say that it doesn't influence much
Because, I believe that the whole life of a pastor's family is centered around church much more
Than such a family's life where a mother and a father go to work from 9 to 5
They come home, change their clothes and then they are
Just a family or someone else
But a pastor's job
I think it's a job that influences a bit more also the family life
Moving is one of these things that come to my mind
When I talk about what it means to be a pastor's kid
How many homes have you had? How much have you moved?
Pärnu... if I count it then Pärnu is the 6th place for me in Estonia
Plus I also count Newbold as the 7th place
So then there are 7 places where I feel like home or where I have stayed for a while
But this moving which meant changing school and leaving friends behind
And finding new ones and so forth
How did this influence you?
They were tough times
And the strange thing is that it never got any easier
Now this last moving to Pärnu was easier because
Now I feel I have settled in England and I had a stable place to go back to
But the one before that, moving from Rakvere to Tartu
Come on, I was already in university, I was 20 when we moved and still
I sat on the stairs and cried my eyes out that day
For some reason on that moment it is always such a tragedy
And how you have to see your room without curtains and all the things have been taken out
And nothing is yours any longer and it's not your place any longer and
These are... quite tough memories
But at the same time I always look back on it as on a journey which is not random
Which is not just a series of incidents but I firmly believe that it has had a purpose in my life
When I think of the schools I have happened to study in or who have been my teachers
Or who have been the people who have influenced me here and there
I would be much poorer person if I had lived my life only in one place
And on the other hand I believe that
Maybe God has had a purpose with it too
As I study theology now and things seem to go to a certain direction
Maybe He needed to give me this experience
What it means to go from one place to another
And not to have a real home feeling in any of these places
Maybe I need to continue this journey or maybe I can benefit from it in the future
The fact that you had to change school in an early age and had to start all over again
Most of the people who start school graduate in the same place
Do you think this has made you better at starting relationships
And trained you, toughened you somehow, to adapt in new places?
I think it has tougened me
Because it's like being thrown into water
And if you don't want to drown, you start swimming and start building relationships
But I've never been very good at this in a sense that
It always takes me time to make friends and
I'm not particularly opened because my life has gone this way or
It hasn't been very easy to communicate with strangers or to adapt in different places
It still requires time and it still takes a while for me to do these things
But once again thinking about these 6 homes, 6 churches, 6 towns where your father worked
Do you have a favourite place where you wish you stayed longer?
I don't know
I feel like if I named one place I would do unjustice to others
And they have been very different stages of life in the sense that
Age from 1 to 7 is an age you can't really compare to the age from 20 to 25
Which I spent in Tartu, or from 19 to 25
All of these places are close to my heart
Except for Valga and Tallinn, meaning that
We moved from Valga when I was 1 so I don't feel any connection with this place
Neither do I feel any connection with Tallinn
But Põltsamaa, Rakvere, Tartu are these places where
It was good to go to school in Põltsamaa as a kid
A small place, everybody knew everybody
Very strong mucis school, I owe to this a lot
Rakvere was a bit bigger place but I always felt that
There were exceptionally nice young people in the church
They all were a lot older than me, Annely, Toivo, Ruth, Veljo, them
But they knew how to raise us in a Christian spirit
One thing is what comes from home and from parents but
But I think they really raised us well
And their door was always opened for us and
We could always go in and just chat
In that sense I feel that Rakvere was a good place
Plus in Rakvere I had a brilliand Estonian and literature teacher
And I graduated from high school there and it influenced my choice of profession later
And Tartu... it was already a time of maturing and of finding oneself
And time of thinking about what I want
The univerity was great
So all of these places are very close to my heart
For different reasons. But I don't want to prefer one to another
Mervi, when did you become an Adventist?
I always say about it that it probably runs in my veins
Well, that was an ugly translation of an English expression
It's in my blood, let's put it into Estonian
I'm already a forth generation Adventist
You didn't have a free choice
Indeed, it's discrimination
I have grown up in it. And it doesn't mean I didn't have a freedom to choose otherwise
But I was 16 when I was baptized
And already then I was pretty sure that this is what I want to do
To be in this church, to be in this denomination
And now studying theology, I'm thankful to Newbold until the end of my life for
They do two things with us, they teach us to think very critically
Which is a bit scary because with critical thinking many problems come along
But they really make us into Adventists and now I feel
That I'm even more sure and even more connected to this church
So I feel that me growing into an Adventist has been a step by step process but
I have never felt like I should go from here and look for something better
I haven't felt this
Rein, what kind of child was Mervi?
A beautiful child
Did you have any problems? Anything you could point out, things you struggled with?
Just today we talked about the past with Marjam and
Marjam said she doesn't remember anything bad connected to Mervi
And I second that, she was a golden child
We talked about how the movings affected her
Because of you working as a pastor she had to change her schools
While many of her friends could go to one school all their life
How did it seem to you, how did she cope with it?
It wasn't easy
Of course, she herself knows the best how much it affected her and how she felt and
I was always busy with the removal van so these last moments on the stairs and these tears
Marjam can talk about that, I haven't seen them
I know there were tears but I thought back then and I still think that
These first times we moved, they were somewhat easier
Little child adapts to a new place a bit quicker
Bu the more times passed the more there were friends, all the relationships
All of this had to be left behind so the last times we moved, they were harder
Except for the very last time when we moved from Tartu to Pärnu
Now the kid is already a grown-up and she has her own journey
So she has grown out of this
There are two things that always come to mind while talking about your family
Religion and church, and on the other hand music
And both of them play an important role in Mervi's life as well
How much did you as parents guide, push, or even compel to some extent?
I couldn't say we compelled, at the same time
I think it's a natural part of one's education
When we guide a child musically, let's put it this way
For example, here I have contacts with young people
Who either never went to mucis school or didn't graduate it
And I can see they have problems
For example when they want to sing in a church, they have no experience
They can't read the music, and it's tough on them
But when we help our children with this a little
They go to the music school, they will get some kind of education
Yes, I think none of them regrets their studies
But when it comes to Mervi specifically, my valuation is that some people
It's like this parable of Christ in the Bible
Where one got 1 talent, the other one 3 talents and the third one got 5 talents
Then I would say that Mervi is one of these children who has been blessed with many things
And maybe because of that it has been difficult
What to choose in the end? What to stick with?
And she hasn't chosen the music is the sense
That she hasn't tried to get a professional education in it
But at this point it seems like it hasn't been necessary but
She has got the talent and the level she has reached
I think it's quite a good level
So where we have worked these last years, already in Rakvere and especially in Tartu
Mervi with her violin has been a great support in enriching the music life of our church
Maybe I read something into your words, correct me
Yes
But it's as if you alluded that it has disturbed you as a father that she has tried so many things
That 'Daughter, pull yourself together and focus on one thing'?
No, it hasn't, I have enjoyed all these things because
When she has taken a brush and tried to paint with oil colours
Maybe this area she has concentrated on the least, there are other things she has been committed to
But even then when she takes the brush
I say that a bear has stepped on my hand but she tries it and after couple of times of trying
Something really comes out of it and you can see all the potential that's there
If she could study this area, how much more there would come of it
In that sense I don't see a problem in someone being a versatile person
Go for it, in every field possible
But of course one needs to make the choices in life, what to stick with
And it seems like Mervi is coming or has already come to the serious choices
I guess she knows the best about it
What she does at the moment, she's studying theology. Did it come as a surprise for you?
Yes
In her teenage years, did you expect her to get there?
No. I didn't expect this, it came as a real surprise for me, although
I would say that when it comes to spiritual things, she has always taken them very seriously
For example she was 16 whan she was baptized
The story of the baptism was like this. There was a Pathfinders camporee coming
And Aldar Nõmmik let people know that he would like to be baptized in Pathfinders camporee
But he was alone. It would be nice if there was someone else
It would be nice if there was someone by his side
And I remember, it was when we were in Rakvere
And someone came to ask if there was anyone from our church interested
We talked about this in our family and Mervi said, I'll go.
We were surprised because we hadn't had this conversation before
But Mervi said right away that she was ready to go and then her commentary
That there is no alternative for this step anyway
So this showed that there was already something mature within her
And she conciously took this step
So spiritually she had grown well but this choice
Yes, for me this has been a surprising choice but also a little bit pleasant
Well, a little, softly speaking
But pleasant because when she comes and says how much she enjoys theology
Then I'm glad I've found someone in my own family who feels the same way I do
Because often I look in the church and when I prepare my sermons that
I have to remember that everyone needs to understand the message and
It's difficult to use deep theology
Sometimes I can do this a little bit, for a flavour but
But deeper theological discoveries for myself are often just my own discoveries
And I'm fascinated by them and then comes my daughter and she's as fascinated as I am
Or even more, then it warms one's heart
So when a father can make music with his daughter and talk about theology
What else can you ask for
Right
We really tried but we couldn't get anything from your father
About the difficulties of your teenage years
When thinking back on your teenage years
Although in the middle of your puberty you were baptized but still
Did you have a rebellious phase as well?
I don't think I did. I can't remember any slamming of doors or anything like this
I guess there was some pouting
I guess there was some wrangling with class mates at school
I was never too much involved but there was this 'who's in this gang' and 'who's in that gang' thing
But there was never a rebellion against my family or church or life in general
I think the time was such that it was a bit easier to be a teenager than nowadays
I still come from the generation where we played hide and seek outdoors
And where to meet your friends meant to physically see them
Meaning that you went out
Yes, yes, we didn't live in the internet world, we didn't type on a keyboard
We didn't do the things young people now have to go through
In this sense the puberty was relatively easy
Who did you want to become while being younger? When you thought of university
Now in high school?
Yes, around this time
Actually I don't know what I thought in high school
Well, already then I really liked Estonian and literature
I remember that when I went to university
And I hadn't even told my parents about my plans in a sense that
My mother said it was a surprise for her that I chose Estonian philology
But my wish was to go to Tartu university, I didn't want to go anywhere else
But then you didn't live in Tartu yet
We still lived in Rakvere that time because I graduated from high school there
And there were two options one could choose
And then I wrote on the application form first Estonian and Finno-Ugric languages
And secondly, if I hadn't been accepted there, I wrote theology
Which is especially surprising for me now while looking back
That I really have been able to study two things that have interested me the most
I don't know how many people are that lucky
You already told that the university time was very nice and you studied there Estonian
Although it was nice, you didn't stick with it. Did you disappoint in this field?
I can't tell you that. At first I really enjoyed it because
High school time was the hardest time I've had in my life
I honestly didn't want to go to school
For some reason it was emotionally very hard
And then I went to university and suddenly I had so much freedom and
Suddenly I had my own choices and suddenly I could do what I wanted to do
I really delighted in my studies for all these five years
Until the end of my Master's studies
Occasionally I had these questions like 'Is this really what I want to do' and
I remember we came back from the Netherlands, from pastors' council
Where all the pastors of Europe were together and
They took me with them, I translated there a little and
And then it was difficult for me to return to the world of philology
Then it all seemed so meaningless and such
I guess there were already those signs which pointed to this direction
And all the free credits I had in Tartu university I used them in the department of theology
When I counted all my courses in the end of my studies
It turned out I had taken 10 courses from the department of theology in Tartu uni
Which is quite a lot
But after graduating I stayed in my university
I refused to start PhD studies, meaning that
My supervisor didn't want to hear anything about me not continuing with PhD
And they really tried to influence me to go. This is the way to go and so
And I felt good there, meaning that I was already working there and I was an inside person
But I still said I wouldn't do it but I taught in the university for a whole year
I taught the Estonian beginners courses in the university's language centre
And then I taught one course to first year linguistic students
I think it was called The Basics of Academic Writing
So I was continuously connected to the university but already that time
I already thought about leaving
First, that I want to leave home for a while, I want to see the world
And then, I don't know, theology attracted me, I couldn't help it
Let's not go to Newbold yet, let's leave it for later
There are two things I want to talk about connected to Estonia
First, let's come back to music, also your father said at one point that
You didn't continue with music, it didn't become the centre of your life
Was it a possibility for you at some point?
That maybe I'll become a musician
It was a possibility for me but it was a possibility in my early childhood
Meaning that these kind of decisions have to be made early and
These people who become professional musicians choose this way in an early age
In that sense, until the 6th grade I went to Põltsamaa music school
And I had an exceptionally good teacher there
And she pushed me quite hard
And I went to competitions and I was there somewhere near the top
Among children in my age group in Estonia
We're talking about the violin right
Yes yes. And I know she talked to my mother about it
That you should concider sending your child to Tallinn's music high school and so on
There was even one very strong teacher who had agreed to take me as her student
But for some reason it didn't happen and
I'm really thankful to my parents for it because
It would have really been their decision
That they didn't make this decision, that they didn't send me there because
I don't think I would have made it there
I was very home-centred child
And I think it would have been extremely difficult for me to go to Tallinn
Being ten or eleven or twelve years old
And when time passed I just missed this train meaning that
Then I would have had to do extra work and would have had to work extra hard
to catch up with the children
Who had studied in the music high school from the beginning
I remember an ocasion
When we went to Tallinn with Virumaa county youth orchestra
And it was a concert where also Tallinn's music high school orchestra performed
And of course we were like a joke compared to them
It was obvious that they were better than us in every sense
Of course, they are the kids who practice the violin for 5-6 hours a day
And then I came home and then I was upset
I remember telling my mother that
Why didn't you send me to the music high school?
Can you imagine, I would play now in the music high school's orchestra
But I have to play in Virumaa county's youth orchestra instead
But honestly I can't remember a real pain for not choosing this way
But you really know this instrument inside out now, what does it give to you in your life?
For me it's just a pure joy now
It's a hobby, it's something that creates very positive emotions in me
And if I've understood it correctly
Then I think it creates positive emotions in others as well
It has happened that there are tears in old ladies eyes after I've played
And that has deeply moved me also
It really is something that makes my life richer
But fortunately it isn't something I have to do for the rest of my life
I'm quite happy about that
There were times in Estonia where journalism wasn't taught in university but
Philologists mainly became journalists
I don't even know when journalism came to universities but there was a time like this
Now, you have also smelled the journalism a little bit
You have put your plihology into practice
You were in Family Radio, for how long did you work there?
Maybe even for four years, at least three, at least three years
How did you get there? You were already in Tartu by this time right?
Yes, it was the summer I graduated from my BA studies and then
I think Averonika (interviewer's wife) was the person who first wrote me
But then I got in touch with Mare Pihlak, the head editor of Family Radio
And she invited me to help them over the summer
And then I went to see how the morning program is being done and then there was
A young man named Kuldar Jürma did morning programs back then and I learnt from him
And then I started with them. The beginning was very hard because
I think even more important than the oral part is the technical part in the radio studio
Especially in Family Radio, true
And especially while doing the morning programs because then
In real time you actually have to press all the right buttons
And it was very difficult and stressful for me to learn all of that
I remember that when I did my first morning programs then
For three hours I was on the air and then I went home and slept for half a day
Because I was as tired and empty as a squeezed lemon
But then I think it was 1.5 years after I had started when
Mare came up with the idea of a youth program
And then I made this Chat Room program as long as for 1.5 years, yes
But I think it's one of those jobs you can get really tired of
Now, just last week I went to Tartu and I visited them and
I checked all their studios and I saw that everything was same old and
And I felt this phase of my life is over now
But what did it give to you?
Is it something that has enriched your life?
Oh yes, it has taught me a lot
It taught me the art of oral self-expression
It's one thing to do it when you can press this button and try everything again
And later you can delete things and edit everything and
But it's another thing to be on air, that's a different story
And truly it's part of a grand story which is very personal and spiritual for me
I was very surprised when my father mentioned this parable of talents because
This parable has meant a lot for me
I could also shed a tear right now
Do it
The fact that I haven't had a talent of speaking
I've realised that I haven't always been able to speak in a special way
You can tell when someone is a natural talent and it all comes so easily for them
I have had to do hard work to learn it
The teaching job in university has helped me a lot with it
When you stand in front of the class room for 90 minutes and it's all your solo
Then you just have to speak, you don't really have a choice
And secondly the job in the radio has developed me a lot
And now I feel I have laid a foundation and I have worked hard
And now I'm in Newbold, the homiletics class and the fact that I've really started preaching
I feel like all of it is some kind of progression
And it's all part of me wanting this talent so bad
And I have bargained and bargained with something I didn't really have
But now I feel that God has taken my efforts seriously
And that He actually adds talents
Let's come to this Newbold thing now
When you went there in the first place, you didn't have a plan to stay longer did you?
I didn't
How did it all happen?
That's how it happened
I went and sat in the course director's office
And I said, I'm here for one year, I would like to study some theology
I have no plan to stay here longer than that. What are the courses I can take?
It was some special program for one year right?
Yes. It's called the licence
But now they changed the name a bit, now it's called a graduate diploma
And you can take it when you already have a degree in some other field
And it's really designed for people who want to switch to theology
They already have a BA or a MA
We even had a lady in our class who had done her PhD in business and then came to theology
And after this one intensive year you get an access to Master's studies
This is the purpose of this course
I was very blue-eyed, I went there and thought everything would be so easy there
And well, I have already studied some theology in Tartu
How hard can it be, why not study theology for a year
And I told them that I only wanted to stay there for one year
And they gave me an opportunity to do the interest licence
And there you can basically take all the courses you want to take
They give you this diploma but that's it
And this guy asked me, Are you sure you want to do the interest licence?
The other one is top-up licence which is meant for continuing in Master's
Are you sure you don't want to leave this door opened?
And I said, no no no, I don't want it, that's all I came here for
And then I studied for half a year with this perspective
And then I came home for Christmas
And by the time I went back in the end of January, I had already changed my mind
At least when it came to changing my interest licence to top-up licence
And then once more I sat in somebody's office and then
They gave a permission to change my course
They told me to do some changes in my study plan
But in general, when I graduated in spring time then I had an access to MA studies
And when I saw my results
That I had graduated with distinction which is about 100 times more difficult there
Than it is in Estonia, no kidding
Then the question wasn't any more, Do I want to continue?
But it was, Can I continue?
And that decision didn't depend on me any more
But it depended on the church and their will to support my studies
So this year changed my mind
Can you describe, what do you find in theology
I think for a lot of people, also for Christians,
For church members who read the Bible and the quarterly
As Christians and as people of the Bible we stand very close to it
But how big is the step in becoming theology-centred, what does this
In addition to all of what you have learnt from your childhood
How big is the qualitative step from it?
It's a huge step forward
I can't even put it into words
For example the fact that I can almost, almost read the New Testament in its original language
At least the simpler texts
How many nuances you suddenly start to notice
How many controversial points suddenly come up
Because words have more meanings than just one
This is completely philological again, the semantics and everything that's connected to it
And there's something about theology that keeps surprising me
Some kind of depth
The fact that it's not just theoretical but it's also very practical
Or, if I study linguistics or something like this
I can separate myself from the object or from my studies
But theology is different, I'm living in it
And I can see how I change within this proccess
And I can see how my own faith changes to a great extent
And I know it can be dangerous because
To study theology, especially in such an academic way as they teach us in Newbold
There are people who leave because they can't handle their inner conflicts
But on the contrary, I have found some real depth
And I can see how it shows in my practical life
It's something I never experienced while studying other things
So on one hand it's my academic interest
And my joy from new knowledge as a very academic, book-worm type of person
And on the other hand my life and experience as a sincere Christian
And it's all put together there
It's super nice, I couldn't wish for anything better
I've heard people saying that your faith has to be very strong to be able to study theology
You also alluded to it just now
That not everyone can handle it
And you mentioned those controversial points which come up when you read the original language
And everything your lecturers talk about
Do you feel like your childhood faith is under attack somehow?
Some things are under attack
And in some sense it's good that some things are under attack
Because a childlike faith can become very static and stereotyped
You know these people who have an answer to all the questions in the world
And who know exactly how the world was created because they stood right there with their watch
And then it's so good when some old brick walls are brought down
I feel my faith is much more dynamic now
I'm not afraid of questions
I'm not afraid to say that I don't know how some things have happened
Or that I don't have an answer to this and that question
It's a place where you need to find a balance
Of course there are issues where I feel that I need to be unshakable
That my faith in God must be firm
And there are other topics where I find that no
Whatever I have believed so far
That it's not bad when I at least ask questions
I don't need to change my beliefs right away
But it's not bad to ask questions about things
Actually we arranged this interview in summer when we were camping in Võrumaa
And there we asked you couple of things in front of a camera
And one of your thoughts really sticked with me, a thought about ecological life style
And now when you said that what you're studying is not only theoretical but practical
I feel like one's faith and theory must find an expression somehow
Like in green thinking
Let's pause here and listen to your reasoning back in summer
In theological sense Adventism is the most holistic and maybe even most mature
Because it touches all the aspects of human life and also teological aspects
In that sense our foundamentals are very good
Because we start by stating that God has created us
And now our foundamentals end with the fact that
We as God's stewards have an obligation to protect the nature and the environment
Which is almost a revolutionary thought compared to some other churches
Adventism as an entirety which I've tried to look at from a distance meaning that
What are the things that we believe
It's very sympathetic because it tries to take things holistically
And it tries to comprise a human life as whole
That's why I find Adventism to be so sympathetic
Continuing with this thought, how come theology seems to be killing the living faith in some
But you say that it raises it to a new practical level
Is there something you do that some other theology students don't
Who become lifeless hairsplitters
Discussing how big shoes Jesus wore or whatever they're discussing
Have you taken a specific approach that
I try to maintain, I try to find, find this practical application
Conciously I haven't done anything for it
Does it mean that we have reason to praise Newbold's lecturers for that?
I think so yes
I think they try, even if there's a very theoretical issue
They try to find connections with the practical life
And I really feel that my practical life and my choices
Just like we talked about the green way of thinking
And how green I've really become there
And how I emphasize the environment and the importance of taking care of it
All of it has come so naturally
I haven't forced myself to connect the practical and theoretical part
I don't even know how it has gone this way
What's your topic? What are you studing, writing about?
My pathway in Master's is New Testament
And Biblical languages
Meaning that they are the same thing, in Biblical languages pathway
You can choose either NT and Greek or OT and Hebrew
So I study Greek on an advanced level
And then there are more general courses as well
In the beginning of this interview you said a phrase which I wrote down
And I'm going to remind you of it now
Refering to Newbold and your studies you said that things are pointing to certain direction
What direction? What do you think? Where will you end up?
If I'm perfectly honest then I don't have a clue
But I know I have a direction meaning that
If you want to know whether I will become a pastor, I don't have an answer to that question
And there are several factors playing a role there
But concidering the fact that I have a contract with the church
That they're paying for my studies
And that they expect a return service from me after graduating
So in this sense it all points to the direction of the church
I want to work for the church, this is certain
More and more I want to put my knowledge I've got into practice
So in this sense there has been a huge shift over the last 1,5 years
As I told you in the beginning about how I went there at first and kicked the door open
And said that I'm here just for a year and I have no more interest in it
And how seriously and on a deeper level I study theology now
Of course it has changed the direction of my life
And I want, I want to continue with it
I want to preach, and I want to be useful for church somehow
But how exactly it will happen, only God knows it
In our church there are some questions at issue, some debates
Which also theologians investigate
The topic of women in church is one of those, and it has been for a long time already
We talk about the role of women in church leadership, not only in the position of a pastor
As our church has been built up, one can serve as a pastor
While having the ordination of an elder, not necessarily an ordination of a pastor
Maybe you're not the most objective person to talk about it
But still, from your perspective, as a woman and as a theology student
I'm sure you're familiar with arguments and counterarguments
What do you think of this debate?
It's a very interesting debate
And it's really a broader debate than those people usually understand
Who are involved in this discussion
And who are either for or against the ordination of women
Because the question isn't so much about whether a female could be ordained or not
In reality behind this question there is a lot of hermenutics
And everything comes down to the question, How do we read the Bible?
And how do we interpret the Bible?
Because you can't read the Bible without interpreting it
Concidering the fact that it's an ancient book
And the clash doesn't happen so much on the level of that particular question
But rather on the level of different ways of interpretation
And there are very different ways of how people do it
And that's where these disputes and questions come from
For me this question is quite simple because I've thought it through
And like you said I'm obviously not completely objective in this debate
But I personally don't see a problem here
Because when people come and support their view with some passage from the Scripture
Saying, See, apostle Paul says this and that
Then it's very surprising for me that these same people, when turning 10 pages in their Bible
That they don't also say that the slaves should be obedient to their masters
In one case it's absolutely clear to them that this command is written
In a certain context and historical and cultural place where apostle Paul said these words
But in another case they take his words which were written 2000 years ago
And they ignore the time-slot and say, See, apostle Paul wrote that
Just yesterday morning I read the epistle to Ephesians
And in the 2nd chapter Paul talks about all the barriers being brought down in the temple
When we know how the temple looked like then we know that
There was separate part for women, for Gentiles, for men
Then there were places where priests or only the high priests were allowed to go
And then apostle Pauls says, All the dividing walls have been taken down
There's neither male nor female, neither Jew nor Greek
And then it makes me sad when people start building up barriers again
But theologocally it's an interesting topic indeed
And on the other hand it's a personal topic as well
Time will show where this discussion will go
But now give some hints for viewers-listeners, Where are you in 5 year's time?
Where are you heading to?
A friend asked me the same question just yesterday on Skype
And I answered him
If I can remember it and put it into Estonian
I would like to be preaching
I would like to teach one day again
Maybe I want to write a book in 10 years time
And I don't want to be very settled, meaning that
I would have to live for the next 50 years in the same place
These are my dreams
I don't know if God can find a way to make these dreams come true
But right now there's a peace and certainty in my heart
Because I can see in Newbold that the world is a bit bigger than it seems from Estonia
And I know that the church has many different needs in many places
And the church desperately needs people with different qualifications
Just like Dr Daniel Duda told us in one of his classes
The Adventist church needs every single person
Who is willing to give their time and talents to build up this church
In this sense I'm not afraid I won't have anything to do
Where exactly God leads me, I don't know
When people ask me
Well, you've been in England for 1,5 years now, do you want to stay in England?
Then I... a little bit... it's strange for me in the sense that
I don't want to live in England for the sake of living in England
And I don't want to live in Estonia for the sake of living in Estonia
But in 5 year's time I want to live in a place where
God sees I can put my talents into practice and work for His kingdom the best way
And I think there might come some surprises
He has let me do such about-turns in my life which I could never imagine
And it seems to me that He might do that again in the future because
God isn't a God who wants us to live boring lives
But Jesus said, I came to bring you life, an abundant life
Which means that He wants us to life to the fullest
That's one of these motifs or thoughts of Jesus
Which has really sticked with me
I wish there were some adventures in my life in 5 year's time
And that not everything was completely settled
So that God would have a chance to take me here and there
Thank you Mervi for this time
I wish you abundant blessing for discovering your adventure
Thank you
AKEL 2012